Doing the Right Thing: Integrity

Rick Lelchuk — Sun, 12 May 2013 23:56:02 +0000

Doing the right thing is Personal Integrity. Giving one’s word should be a sacred pact between you and another. Others will trust you only if communicate accurately and actually follow through with what you said. Trust once broken is nearly impossible to restore. How many times have people told you they would do something but allowed other things to take priority over their word? “Sorry, something else came up.” What does that mean? Satisfying your immediate urge is more important than what you said you would do? That kind of stuff makes us all crazy and destroys belief in an others word. Unfortunately, what integrity or valor we do see in today’s society is rare. Maybe because our leaders don’t demonstrate the quality some figure it’s OK to be like them. It is the extraordinary exception when people respect what they have said they would do and do it. What does that tell you about that person? Can they be trusted? Does what they say mean anything or are they just saying something to appease? Have you ever judged another who lies and cheats? Of course you have, we all have. Ones opinion of another person is swayed by how they behave. So, how do you want others to regard you and your word? With respect? With trust? With honor? or With suspicion and skepticism? Consider the situation when no one else is around to see if you keep a promise. In other words, what if it’s something you’ve promised yourself? Like making so many phone calls for your business, adding to your blog in a timely fashion (I’m guilty of that one), sweeping the dust into the corner or under the rug, speeding down a deserted road. How well do you honor a promise you’ve made to yourself? What of the employee who helps themselves to some office supplies justifying that the company owes them this little perk? Should the people who caused the housing bubble be held accountable for their actions? Why haven’t they? Where is our national outrage and demand for integrity? Does a person of honor look the other way when they could be doing the right thing? No! We’re all human and we’re going to make mistakes. It’s going to happen. What then does a person of integrity do? They clean up their mess by confessing their mistake and remaking or withdrawing their promise. It’s that simple, and so many find it near impossible to do. How simple is it to pick up the telephone (yes we almost all have one in our pocket) and call the party to whom you made a promise and say what’s so? Very simple and very rare. Here’s a simple formula for maintaining personal integrity: Keep your commitments and promises on time or don’t make them. When you have failed to keep a commitment or promise you: Acknowledge that failure as soon as your realize it And, clean up any mess you created for those who were counting on your commitments and promises. Even then people will trust your word, knowing you mean what you say. Oh, and while we’re at it – say what you mean. !===!===!===!===!===!===!===!===! Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted with important matters. ~Albert Einstein Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not. ~Oprah Winfrey Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one. ~Marcus Aurelius, Meditations I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and to incur my own abhorrence. ~Frederick Douglass If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it. ~Marcus Aurelius, Meditations Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you. ~H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Inspiration: Your Personal Mover and Shaker

Rick Lelchuk — Fri, 19 Apr 2013 19:51:20 +0000

Someone or something has inspired you at some time in your life. Perhaps it was a rousing speech, a breath-taking piece of art, music, poetry or prose, an act of kindness or heroism, a bonding with the wonder of Mother Nature. Any of it can be inspiring. As long as you are open to and looking for, inspiring things can be found anywhere. It’s that overwhelming feeling of joy and satisfaction, of the desire to create or to teach. Inspiration puts a smile on your face, a bounce in your step and demands to be expressed. It just can’t be held in as you find you are animated to share your thoughts, ideas and feeling. You find yourself stimulated both mentally and physically. Inspiration can be the source of a state of high creativity and activity. When one is inspired they are naturally, automatically, forced into action. Unsurprisingly, inspiration motivates. Further, those who are inspired affect and sway others. There is a cosmic power associated with being inspired. Think of a time you were in the presents of the inspired. How did it make you feel? What did it make you want to do? Inspiration is contagious Much like being in love, being inspired is equally as difficult to define and explain. Still it is under our control. We can choose to put ourselves in a willingness to be inspired. Personally, I am inspired by almost anything that flies. If it is on the wing, to me, it is a thing of beauty and grace, at one with nature, in control of its surroundings. It brings me to the high state of desire, creativity, joy and yearning. It’s difficult to use mere words to express the feeling. For instance, when I picture a large bird effortlessly riding the wind currents, banking and swooping, dipping and rising, I am inspired. When I see an airplane leaving a contrail 7 miles high I am awed by its ability to magnificently dominate the air. Once I’ve captured that feeling I can turn to any task I wish to undertake and transfer the feeling with gusto. How about your? Is there just one thing that grabs you, moves you and inspires you? Something that gets your juices flowing that you can use to inspire yourself at will? Rather than waiting for inspiration to find you, cause it to happen at will. Put yourself in a state of inspiration by design and let it spill into any area in which you need to be enthused. I think this is a nifty little tool. Give it a try and see if you can’t make it work for you. Who or what inspires you? !===!===!===!===!===!===!===!===! “Do one thing every day that scares you.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club. ~Jack London Inspiration exists, but it has to find us working. ~Pablo Picasso The power of imagination makes us infinite. ~John Muir Don't expect a miracle from the minimum. In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure. ~Bill Cosby

Between Fantasy and Reality – Imagination

Rick Lelchuk — Sat, 06 Apr 2013 19:54:53 +0000

In some form or another each of us has the ability to use his or her imagination. Some are able more than others. Imagination is the ability to create in thought anything, real or not. Using your imagination puts things into your mind without necessarily the use of the five senses. We use imagination every day. We use it in storytelling, the theater, movies, TV, literature, fantasy, radio. In business imagination brings products and services from thought into reality. Personally we can envisage our development, happiness, an ideal life. We all call upon our imagination to fill in the blanks. We play “what if” or “make believe” with our imagination. Sometimes it’s good, sometimes not so. Regardless of the type of content we maintain total mastery and control over our imagination. Just as thoughts are things, so too is our imagination. Children are experts allowing their imagination run wild. One moment a little boy is a pirate searching for doubloons and treasure, the next an ace fighter pilot shooting bad guys out of the sky. In an instant a young girl is dancing with Prince Charming and the next on stage singing and dancing to a cheering audience. Using your imagination to put yourself in another's shoes is a brilliant way to get into another's world. It can be a powerful tool for understanding and tolerance. On a personal level Imagination can be a potent instrument to alter one’s mood or to release tension. Great for problem solving, imagination can help you see the successful outcome of a tough situation. It is especially useful in personal development in viewing the outcome of created goals. How would one go about creating a goal with the type outcome that would be satisfying? Here are the steps to take to begin the process. Start with a blank mind. That is going to be the first step in imagining. Sit in a comfortable, quiet space. Let all the distractions fade away. Perhaps some soothing music or the sound of water can help to set the mood. See in your mind’s eye an empty canvas and nothing more. A large blank space that covers your entire field of vision. Stare at the canvas and allow it’s emptiness to be. Pick an area you’d like to work on. Perhaps it’s work or business, personal relationships, your spirituality, your relationship with your supreme being, a project you want to get started. Pick an area that is important to you. At the bottom of the blank canvas are your tools to create. Some may see paint brushes, others sculpting tools, still others will see the gear of your creative process. Reach down and take one of the items to begin creating on the canvas. You can’t vividly imagine a vague future. So be detailed as you create, as you imagine. Focus on a future in which you’re passionate. See the shapes and colors of the outcome you wish to have happen. Set the location, the time frame, the people involved, leave nothing out. Now, here’s a key to making this a success – set it in motion, give it action, make it come alive. See the leave on the trees move, listen as people are talking, what distant sounds and motions can you imagine. Finally, begin to see the outcome of your goal take shape. It blends in from all angles to become the focal point of your imagination. There is always some piece of reality within our imagination that grounds us to this world. Tie that in with the place you are right now and start to actually create the future you wish. !===!===!===!===!===!===!===!===! I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, and that enables you to laugh at life's realities. ~Dr. Seuss Imagination is more important than knowledge. ~Albert Einstein I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free. ~Michelangelo Can you imagine what I would do if I could do all I can? ~Sun Tzu You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. ~Mark Twain Think left and think right and think low and think high. Oh, the thinks you can think up if only you try! ~Dr. Seuss

The Secret to Happiness – There Is No Secret

Rick Lelchuk — Sat, 23 Mar 2013 18:44:23 +0000

“Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” ~Abraham Lincoln This post starts with a famous quote for a very good reason. This Lincoln witticism about sums up the whole subject on happiness. How happy are you? How much of the time are you happy? What influences your happiness? The bottom line here, like Lincoln suggests, is that happiness is nothing more than a conversation, the stuff you tell yourself about how happy or unhappy you are. Simpler yet, happiness is a choice. We all know people who seem to be happy all the time; nothing gets them down. Ever wonder how they do that? As it is different for different people, happiness is hard to define. What is true joyful happiness for one is mild amusement for another. Is it easier to say what makes you unhappy and then choose to avoid that? Maybe. If you know a certain person sucks the joy right out of life, then choose to not be around them or find a different way to perceive them. If you find yourself unhappy at work then your happiness is a matter of changing something… either your attitude or your job. Perhaps both! How about we look at the really big question about happiness – Can money buy happiness? As most would agree it cannot and does not, but most would agree they’d like to try it with money rather than without. Actually, according to a TED Talk by Michael Norton money can bring you happiness when it is spent on another. See for yourself - http://on.ted.com/MNorton Most of what we do day in and day out is humdrum, the same old same old, monotonous stuff. How and where then can one find their happiness in that? It is within you even in the daily routine. If you’re not prone to being happy all the time, being happy all the time takes practice. Here are a couple of things you can begin to do right now to affect happiness in your life:

√ Check the most nagging item off your “to do” list. (Don’t just check it off, actually do it.)

√ Practice smiling for no reason. (Did you know babies smile in the womb?)

√ Find something beautiful and admire it.

√ Be grateful for something. (Start small and work your way up.)

√ Reach out to another just to say hello. (Reach out but don’t touch.)

√ Smile at a stranger. (Play the “I’ll bet I can make you smile game.)

√ Laugh out loud (People will wonder what you’re up to.)

√ Become an organ donor. (It’s a good idea though to wait on fulfilling this one.)

√ Become a big brother or big sister. (Make someone else happy.)

√ Give yourself a high five or a victory pump.

√ Make funny faces at yourself in the mirror. (It’s OK to smile at yourself, too.)

√ Give someone some money for no reason. (That’s to someone you don’t know.)

√ Send a funny greeting card unexpectedly.

√ Watch a TED Talk. (Careful, these are guaranteed to become addictive. Let me get you started. Click Here for 9 Happiness talks from TED.)

√ Listen to your favorite piece of music. (Dancing is recommended.)

√ Forgive yourself for something. (This could be the start of something beautiful.)

√ Count your blessings. (Don’t stop till you get to 100.)

√ Tell yourself a dirty joke. (See, you’re smiling already!)

√ Declare yourself to be a happy person. (Do it for just 60 seconds to start out. We don’t want you to blow a fuse.)

√ Do something you know makes you happy.

√ Oh, of course you can practice your smile.

√ Stop reading this. Get off your butt and do something. NOW!

You can see that the list could be endless. Happiness is in everything, everywhere so long as you’re looking for it. Remember, happiness is contagious. Practice, practice, practice! This is worth repeating... "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” ~Abraham Lincoln

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly – Habits

Rick Lelchuk — Fri, 08 Mar 2013 01:45:11 +0000

We all have habits. Heck, my cats have habits too. But, we’re human and we still can’t help ourselves. We all do things automatically, without thinking about doing them. Some habits are good, like putting on your seatbelt any time you get into a vehicle. Some habits are not so good, like satisfying the urge to text while driving that vehicle. Habits are things you and I do routinely, mechanically, robotically. You can do complex behavior without being mentally aware of it at all. Habits weren’t always fixed. As near we can tell, no one is born with habits, good or bad, neatly aligned and in place. They were developed over time. Even today to formulate a habit you must grow it. That’s a double edged sword since you can either create or destroy a habit and those habits can be either detrimental or beneficial. The development of a habit is closely related to the development of emotions, memories and pattern recognition. A part of the brain called the basal ganglia is thought to play a key role in the formation of habits. The scientific and psychological discussions regarding habits are vast. We know that it is far easier to prevent a habit from being formed than it is to break an established one. I’m reminded of the time when I decided to quit smoking cigarettes for the fifth or sixth time. I did an experiment. Firstly I began to notice when I automatically grabbed for a cigarette. I found that a smoke was used as a reward for something done well or completed or, on the other hand, as a comfort when something didn’t go as expected. I didn’t quit right away, but I became more and more aware of the times I lit up. I began to change the reward pattern by substituting a cigarette for another habit forming reward. (Just so you know, I eventually quit Dec. 23, 2003 by going cold turkey.) The principle was sound because I was recognizing the pattern and altering behavior. One of the most effective ways to change a habit is to do it with a committed buddy. As humans, if left alone, we tend to sleaze out on ourselves. It’s one of the reasons AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) is such a success, you’re never left alone. If you make a promise to another you are less likely to break that pledge. Set it up so you check in daily at first (hourly if necessary) and then taper off as it becomes easier to recognize and alter your behavior. Our habits are powerful companions that provide a sense of comfort and satisfaction and that what makes it all the more difficult to break. Be assured that bad ones can be broken and even good ones can be tamed with persistence. !===!===!===!===!===!===!===!===! Your net worth to the world is usually determined by what remains after your bad habits are subtracted from your good ones. ~Benjamin Franklin Not managing your time and making excuses are two bad habits. Don't put them both together by claiming you "don't have the time". ~Bo Bennett Good habits formed at youth make all the difference. ~Aristotle You leave old habits behind by starting out with the thought, 'I release the need for this in my life'. ~Wayne Dyer Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married? ~Barbra Streisand It is easier to prevent bad habits than to break them. ~Benjamin Franklin Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits. ~Mark Twain Television is like the invention of indoor plumbing. It didn't change people's habits. It just kept them inside the house. ~Alfred Hitchcock

Life’s Secret Sauce – Gratitude

Rick Lelchuk — Sun, 24 Feb 2013 20:12:53 +0000

It doesn’t take much, nor is it hard to find something to be grateful for when you make the time to look. There are abundant opportunities to show your thankfulness, appreciation and gratitude. The world is a wonderful place and all you and I have to do is take a peek. Study upon study have shown that those who practice feeling grateful and expressing their gratitude exhibit heightened alertness, enthusiasm, determination, optimism, and energy. They have less depression and stress and are more likely to make greater progress toward achieving personal goals. Living out of being grateful is a powerful and rewarding place to come from. It promotes a happy outlook on life. The book The Secret refers to gratitude extensively. In one section Rhonda Byrne talks of a Gratitude Rock, a keep sake you carry with you as a reminder to be grateful. I recently misplaced the stone I have been carrying with me. Rather than being upset about it I found reason to be grateful for having had that particular stone for so long. I’ve replaced it with another so the intent remains. How to Be Grateful What does it take to have gratitude in your life? Like everything else it takes practice. You must learn to be grateful and have gratitude. You can be grateful at any time and in any place. Here’s a simple process in which to get started.

1. Firstly, take notice of your surroundings. Relax, look around you, find something, anything, of interest, something pretty, a color, a shape, a scene and be thankful for it and your ability to see it, smell it, or touch it. Appreciate that is it in the world and in your world. Let the feeling well up within you. Put a big grin on your face as an acknowledgement of your gratitude. Let that work its magic on you.

2. Now pick something else, say something in nature, and appreciate it. Be grateful for the sun, the rain and the wind, the birds, the bugs and the bees. Be grateful for the cycles of life, the day that turns into night and the night that turns into day. Be grateful for the cycles of the moon the rotation of the earth and its orbit around the sun.

3. Next pick something a little more challenging to be grateful for. Pick an upsetting situation, a troubling incident or a person you’re not very fond of and be thankful for each one. Whether you know it now or not each of these has probably taught you a valuable life lesson, one you can carry with you from now on. This may be more difficult as there is probably emotion tied up in it. Find a reason to be grateful and appreciative.

Everything happens for a reason. Fortunately, we can be patent to learn what that is. We must be open to recognize the gift in a circumstance that may not appear to be a gift. Be grateful for the people in your life… all of them; the people both good and not so good. Be grateful for the times in which you live, for you have no choice in that matter, but you do have choice show gratitude. Be grateful that you can show gratitude and the joy it brings. Here are a couple of additional suggestions to cause gratitude to be in your life:

- Start a gratitude journal and daily write down the things, no matter how seemingly insignificant, for which you are grateful.

- Close your emails or posts with something you have gratitude for. Focus on what’s good in the world, on the things you want.

- Before you go to sleep every night say 3 things you are grateful for and end the exercise with, “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

These are simple tasks that can make a huge difference in your gratitude attitude in a very short time. I am grateful to you for taking your precious time to read this post. Thank you! !===!===!===!===!===!===!===!===! “The riches they receive will be in exact proportion to the definiteness of their vision, the fixity of their purpose, the steadiness of their faith, and the depth of their gratitude.” ~Wallace D. Wattles, The Science of Getting Rich “The greatest and most resultful of all prayers are those offered as gratitude for the blessings we already have.”~Napoleon Hill “Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson “Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.” ~Epicurus “Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel to say your nightly prayer. And let faith be the bridge you build to overcome evil and welcome good.” ~Maya Angelou, Celebrations: Rituals of Peace and Prayer “Some people grumble that roses have thorns; I am grateful that thorns have roses.” ~Alphonse Karr

The Selfless Act of Enduring Love – Forgiveness

Rick Lelchuk — Sat, 09 Feb 2013 21:29:11 +0000

Forgiveness is such a rich topic. We can forgive at any time we choose, but the paradox is we never forget what we forgave. Why is that so? It seems to be a very hard thing for people to do. It is so freeing to forgive, to let go of past upsets and to move forward.

Since stories usually best exemplify what is meant and the lesson to be learned, let me share a story with you. This is a true story of an extra-ordinary man who forgave.

The man’s mother, a grandmother to his children, took the same route everyday to do her marketing. She crossed several streets on her way; one particular street had a blind curve in it. As fate would have it one day a delivery truck rounded the corner, struck the woman and she died. The upset driver was taken to police headquarters for questioning.

The adult son learned of the tragedy and went to the police station to understand what had happened. The police told him of the accident explaining it was unintentional as his mother stepped off the curb into the path of the truck. Obviously shaken and distressed about having just lost his mother he asked if he could see the driver. The police were reluctant to let him see the man thinking he wanted to extract some sort of revenge on the poor driver. After some convincing words the police escorted him to see the driver.

With both men in tears, the son told the driver that he knew he did not set out that day to kill his mother. He knew it was an accident and not deliberate. He also told the man that he did not want to add to his burden and pain and wanted him to know that he forgave him for the accident. The police were totally taken aback by the generosity of the son and his willingness to forgive the man.

This selfless act of forgiveness would never take away the pain the driver felt or bring back the woman, but it started the healing process for them both.

Without the forgiveness both men would have been enslaved to unnecessary hate, anger and self recrimination. Resentment and bitterness would have taken root. Unforgiving people are held in their past, with all its hurt and pain, venom and poison, unable to move forward in life.

Forgiveness requires a high degree of responsibility. Taking responsibility requires one to give up blame and look to the true source of the action. In the case of the son above an accident was the cause and forgiveness an honorable thing to do.

But, what would happen if an incident were intentional? What then about forgiveness? Surely we’ve all felt like we’ve been taken advantage of or wronged at one point in our lives or another. What then of forgiveness?

I can tell you, from firsthand experience, even if an offense were intentional, forgiveness, as difficult as it might be to give, is the best course of action.

Having had $35,000 due to me not paid consumed my entire existence. Everything in my life revolved around “getting back at” the person who stole my money. I had earned it legitimately and I was due it. Even with all my thoughts of revenge the money was not coming… ever, and it took me years to forgive over and over again until I was able to finally put it behind me. My whole life was on hold because of an obsession.

Once I forgave I was able to move forward and live again. I only wish today it hadn’t taken me so long to forgive and move on.

One final point about forgiveness needs to be mentioned. It starts with forgiving yourself. If you don’t forgive yourself for your mistakes, the hurtful things you said or thought healing cannot begin. We are all human and subject to these hard and emotional choices. Choose to forgive yourself first and the rest will come with ease.

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Quotes about forgiveness:

“Any fool knows men and women think differently at times, but the biggest difference is this. Men forget, but never forgive; women forgive, but never forget.” ~Robert Jordan

“To err is human, to forgive, divine.” ~Alexander Pope

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.” ~Steve Maraboli

“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.” ~Mark Twain

“Forgiveness has nothing to do with absolving a criminal of his crime. It has everything to do with relieving oneself of the burden of being a victim--letting go of the pain and transforming oneself from victim to survivor.” ~C.R. Strahan

“Throughout life people will make you mad, disrespect you and treat you bad. Let God deal with the things they do, cause hate in your heart will consume you too.” ~Will Smith

“To be wronged is nothing, unless you continue to remember it.” ~Confucius

“As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison.” ~Nelson Mandela

Fear: Is It Your Boogie Monster?

Rick Lelchuk — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 17:09:10 +0000

There are really only two kinds of fear. There is true fear, fear of physical harm, fear for one’s life, like when you lose control of your car or when someone holds a knife at your throat or points a gun at you. That’s gut wrenching fear of the most valid type. It invokes the fight or flight response mechanism built into all biological life forms as a basic survival tool. Fortunately, we are not regularly faced with the life threatening fear, as say our ancestor’s feared being some sabre tooth tiger’s lunch. And, there is the non-life threatening fear. This kind of fear is made up, where there is no apparent threat to life or limb. It might be better characterized as anxiety rather than fear. It’s the stories of the boogie monster or the fear of public speaking. It’s the fear of being embarrassed, rejected or humiliated; the fear of change - none of which is fatal. Yet this kind of fear, the made up fear, can dominate and limit one’s life. Does this other fear make it any less real to us? Probably not because we tend give it so much credibility. Fear of failure seems to be a biggie. Why? So you attempted something and failed at it. You’re human and humans are far from perfect. You miss a step and fall down, you spill things, and you say things you wished you hadn’t. Humans make mistakes and fail. It is part of the living process. However, how you view failure makes all the difference. Failure is a tool to living; it is the experience you take forward never to fear making the same mistake again. Failure is part of living and fearing failure could translate into being afraid of living. Fear is an emotion induced by a perceived threat. People can develop specific fears as a result of learning. This has been studied in psychology as fear conditioning. A good question to ask is, if fear is a learned emotion can it be unlearned? Of course it can. Procrastination can be a direct consequence of fear. Someone who is fearful will contemplate the “what if’s” in life to the point of immobility. Fear will limit your ability to move forward, develop, improve or follow your dreams. Overcoming any fear will free you to pursue your dreams and desires, your personal development and self improvement with vitality. The antidote to fear, as Susan Jeffers wrote, is to "Feel the Fear . . . and Do It Anyway." Develop courage by facing your fears and pushing through them. It may not be an easy thing to do but there is joy and fulfillment on the other side. That’s a promise. It is beyond the scope of this text to coach you how to overcome your fears. There are ample professionals trained to help you successfully work through your fears. If you are true to yourself and your dreams and think that fear might be holding you back then you owe it to yourself to seek the help to conquer your fears. We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot. ~Eleanor Roosevelt I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear. ~Nelson Mandela If you know the enemy and know yourself you need not fear the results of a hundred battles. ~Sun Tzu Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us. ~Marianne Williamson If you want to conquer fear, don't sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy. ~Dale Carnegie Do not fear mistakes. You will know failure. Continue to reach out. ~Benjamin Franklin Have no fear of perfection - you'll never reach it. ~Salvador Dali Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dream. ~Paulo Coelho

Faith: The Intangible Power

Rick Lelchuk — Sat, 19 Jan 2013 15:11:53 +0000

Have you ever believed in something so deeply that you just knew it’s going to happen or that it was the absolute truth and yet there was no way to prove it? Then you have had faith about that thing. Faith is as about as intangible as it gets. Faith has no shape or form of its own. You can’t touch it, see it, smell it or hear it. It can’t be bought or sold or traded. It can only be felt on the deepest of personal levels and yet, it is one of the most powerful forces known to mankind. We are NOT, heaven forbid, going to discuss faith in religious terms, thereby avoiding various degrees of being offensive. But, religious faith can be certainly taken as a prime example of the power of faith. It’s difficult to explain faith to another, like explaining the color red. One must experience it firsthand to grasp its influence. Let me tell you my personal story of faith. It involves a divorce and two young boys. It was obvious to both of us that our marriage was coming to an end after only 10 years. In that time we brought two healthy boys into the world - my sons. The one thing I wanted my sons to know is that, although their mother and I were no longer going to be together, they would always have a father who loved them, a father they would know and could count on. I knew in my heart of hearts that no matter what happened my sons would know they had a father, I would remain an integral part of their lives, provide a male influence and give them guidance and advice as needed or requested. There was absolutely no doubt in my mind that this was to be, I would have a relationship with my sons and they will have grown up knowing that they had a father that stuck with them. My faith was unalterable. My belief in how it was going to turn out was as solid as the Rock of Gibraltar. This would happen and it would happen the way I saw it happening… and, little wonder, it did. Today my married sons and I continue to enjoy a wonderful parent/child relationship and I wouldn’t trade my bear hugs with them for anything. We are father and sons by anyone’s definition. That is only one example of faith, and I like to think of it as a pretty good one. In the realms of personal development and self improvement faith plays a vital role. You must develop faith in self and in your individual abilities to accomplish those things that are of most importance. With faith comes action and confidence. The opening paragraph of Chapter 3 - Faith, Visualization of, and Belief in Attainment of Desire - of Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich, reads: “FAITH is the head chemist of the mind. When FAITH is blended with the vibration of thought, the subconscious mind instantly picks up the vibration, translates it into its spiritual equivalent, and transmits it to Infinite Intelligence, as in the case of prayer.” He also says, “Faith is a state of mind which may develop at will…” “Repetition of affirmation of orders to your subconscious mind is the only known method of voluntary development of the emotion of faith.” You might consider reading or re-reading Think and Grow Rich for a deeper understanding of how to develop your personal faith. Permit me to enlist the additional support of some of the greater minds ever placed on the planet to help understanding faith.

Faith consists in believing when it is beyond the power of reason to believe. ~Voltaire Faith is a knowledge within the heart, beyond the reach of proof. ~Khalil Gibran

To one who has faith, no explanation is necessary. To one without faith, no explanation is possible. ~Thomas Aquinas

Whatever we expect with confidence becomes our own self-fulfilling prophecy. ~Brian Tracy

Faith is not belief without proof, but trust without reservation. ~D. Elton Trueblood

Faith has to do with things that are not seen and hope with things that are not at hand. ~Thomas Aquinas Faith turns a belief into knowing. While hope could be considered the belief that things can get better, faith is the knowing that things will get better.

May your worthy beliefs turn into faith with ease.

Extraordinary Living Through Discipline

Rick Lelchuk — Sat, 05 Jan 2013 22:49:46 +0000

Of all the topics to be included within the lighter side of self-development, discipline and self-discipline didn’t seem to boil right up to the top. So, maybe that’s why writing this piece has taken me longer than expected. I just wasn’t, nor did I want to be, disciplined enough to write it. Not until I willed myself to write did it get done. You gotta love the irony. So, let’s see if we can have some fun with discipline. First of all, let us clarify; discipline and self-discipline are the same. Simply put, all discipline is self imposed… no one else is going to make you do something, nor do it for you. Even if you are forced into doing something you still must discipline yourself to do it or face the consequences. Discipline carries a touch of a negative ambiance with it. Why is that? Discipline implies a certain degree of restraint, obedience, authority over ones free spirit. Do any of us really want to impose on ourselves control and order, a required and certain way of doing things? Not really. It certainly appears to curtail one’s sense of liberty. Reigning in your life-force so that you can be disciplined to perform in a certain way, at the surface, is doesn’t have much appeal. Just take a look at our everyday lives though. We, all of us, have been endowed with free will. It is the ability to do as we please, come and go when we like, occupy our time as we see fit… of course, all within the constraints placed upon us by morality and the long arm of the law. We actually demonstrate discipline everyday by restraining ourselves from stealing and murdering. So, with discipline comes a control and order for the good. Self control and discipline can be viewed as the assertion of will over base desires. Discipline is a learned trait. We are not born with it. If we were, babies would wait to be fed, toddlers would listen the first time they are told and teens would realize their parents have some wisdom to impart. We must be trained in discipline. As when training yourself in anything you must first accept where you are, start from there and move forward. Don’t compare yourself to anyone else. They are where they are and you are where you are. Circumstances never match. You could begin by tackling challenges that are near your discomfort limit, but that you can successfully accomplish. The more disciplined you become, the easier life gets and the greater challenges you can take on. With discipline you can overcome any addiction, wipe out procrastination, set and meet your goals. It takes persistence, hard work and working hard. Hmmm, maybe I was right to begin with. Discipline is not the lightest of subjects. But, I think with discipline your life can be extraordinary. Take up a personal challenge today to discipline yourself. Set an uncomfortable goal and see it through to a triumphant conclusion. Anything will do for a start – cut down on your meal portion, make 2 extra cold calls, stay at the gym for an extra 10 minutes, heck, start going to the gym, go to your place of worship regularly for a month, take a day and don’t be judgmental, write the first chapter to the book you’ve wanted to, finish your website, clean the house… whatever you choose discipline will get you to the other side of the task and it will feel fantastic… just like I feel now having finished this post.